Hi Bonnie, I don’t know what to do anymore. I live with anxiety daily and I know that is a very general term, but I don’t know how to overcome it. It feels like I am living in a heightened state of awareness ever since last Christmas when I had a “dark night of the soul” so to speak experience. I had a blepharoplasty eye procedure on both eyes and ever since then it feels like nothing is the same. I did the procedure out of vanity not necessity. All my life I have struggled to love myself so this was just another thing to try to change my outward appearance, so that I would love myself on the inside.
After that and over Christmas 2020 I had such bad anxiety I could not get out of bed for a few days. I was so terrified, not sure why. On top of that my sister died of brain cancer in July 2020 and my dad died of lung cancer in July 2021. I have physical symptoms that I am not sure why. Difficulty swallowing or almost like forgetting how to swallow, and like eating anxiety if that makes sense difficulty breathing at times, almost like I can’t catch my breath. I clench my jaw constantly. I have this almost like obsession with the sun. If it is not shining or on days when it is overcast it becomes a worry for me. I find the sun so liberating to feel it on my skin and when I don’t see it I almost panic like colorphobia feeling. I have like tension in the back of my neck. I talked to an accelerator Eva, and she had mentioned a few things that were going on. I cannot afford anymore to try to figure this out as I have gone into debt trying to free myself from all of this. I can be going along fine, then suddenly a wave of fear comes over me and it feels like my world is ending. Luckily that dreaded feeling doesn’t last long, but it does take a toll on me when it happens over and over all day long. I am exhausted. I was told I have adrenal exhausting. I need help apparently rewiring my adrenals. As well my nervous system is completely stressed out. I have short term memory loss, brain fog and just feel out of it a lot of the time. I really really want to come out of this liberated and peaceful but I just don’t know how. It feels like a black cloud is just around me a lot of the time. Depression and anxiety. I don’t find a lot of joy in life much anymore.
I also have bladder infections all the time. Not sure why.
Can I have a session with you and can you help me? I am desperate to say the least. I feel like I am triggered all the time by these emotional reactions to the news, people around me, anything can set me off. Like I said it is like I am in a state of heightened sensitivity. Sometimes I also feel unreal, meaning that I feel like I am here, but not really involved fully. The world around me can feel unreal at times. I need help in figuring this all out because I have 3 kids and want to heal and move on from this. Please if you can help me tell me what to do. I understand from your video it isn’t a one and done, but I need hope that this will get better.
I need to know the best way to deal with this. Please be honest and let me know the cost and what it will take to overcome this.
I appreciate your time and knowledge and really hope you can help me to start living fearlessly.
Thank you,
Patti